WASHINGTON—Completely mortified while watching the body part detach, Vice President JD Vance reportedly rushed Thursday to put his wife’s head back on after fumbling the second lady. “No, no, no, no!” cried out the 40-year-old vice president, who watched in shock and horror as Usha Vance’s head slipped from his grasp and tumbled onto the floor, bouncing off the leg of an end table before rolling underneath the sofa. “I was only trying to pick her up! Well, shit. It’s not too late, I can fix this. If it comes off, that must mean it can go back on.” At press time, the vice president was hoping no one at the state dinner would notice the duct tape on his wife’s neck.
4 Men Caught Smuggling Hundreds Of Ants
April 19, 2025
Four ant smugglers pleaded guilty after being caught by the Kenyan Wildlife Service attempting to sneak hundreds of giant African harvester ants out of the